I drive by sense memory
My hands like braille on the wheel
Eyes closed against the demons
That come out at night to play
These shadows playing hide and seek
Like the unbidden thoughts of her
But I pretend they do not sting
That I am not ripped from the inside out
In order to get home safely
These other cars pass by going seventy
I blink and they are gone
Leaving blurry spots in their wake
The lights from houses burning bright
Replace them one by one by one
As I pass unseen, by familiar paths
This twisting geography of my soul
Leading me to where I’ve been before
Even if I’m tired of this rhythm
This drum beat that drowns out noise
That leaves me craving another.
The night swallows me entirely
Not even any intermittent lights
To rescue me from disappearing
Road stretched out for an eternity
Beckoning to me like aged wine
Eyelids glued shut against the world
Recalling nights of wild laughter
The touch of a woman’s hand
Soft and feather light, like air
A whisper from across the room
Echoing in the intervening stillness
This maddening kiss, quick on the lips
Just beneath the surface of my thoughts
Soul crushing in its absoluteness
Storm clouds gathering overhead
Waiting for the thunderous warning
That says we’ll be drenched by morning
You calmly riding in the passenger seat
Humming a song I can almost remember
From a time I can’t forget.
And I don’t know how I got back home
These shadows always close in at dusk
This complicated dance until the dawn
When I finally open my eyes again
To drink in the essence of the day
But for now I’ll sleep in the dark
And let the night claim me for its own
Like you did when my eyes could see
You, a supernova that exploded brightly
For a fragment of time, then gone
Your afterimage burned into my eyelids
Even though you’re only a memory
That my senses forgot to forget.