After

I feel your loss
Like a metronome
Banging out memories
Slamming metal on metal
Harshly reminiscent
Of how little time we had
And the clashing
And the clanging
These noises remain
Even after you’re gone
They fill the silences
Like nothing else can
Like a nightmare
On repeat in my brain
Because there is no after
No consequential more
Nothing left but images
Flickering in my periphery
Disembodied conversations
We used to have
But it’s all fading
Like a ghost at dawn
Because you’re gone
And no amount of absence
Could make me feel fonder
This after swallows me whole
Transforming my soul
Into some primordial ooze
Filling the silences
With this anguished scream
That I will never recognize
As my own.

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